Humor brings laughter, lightness and joy into our daily lives. Often times it relieves a tense situation and puts people at ease. Whenever a new semester begins students who do not know me are often a bit defensive and fearful. A big smile and a lighthearted remark made about something other than them often put them at ease.
However I have discovered humor does not always successfully cross cultures. Three weeks ago a crew of Vietnamese men stopped and asked if they could dewinterize my yard. There was a mountain of last fall’s now sodden leaves blanketing everything. I jumped at the opportunity not to have to do it myself. They did a great job. When we walked about afterwards I was so pleased. It was then that I made an errant attempt at humor. There was one leaf. I mean one leaf left in a corner. I pointed at it and said, “Oh, no. A leaf! There is a leaf!” The poor man was crushed. I was joking. He was humiliated that he had not gotten every last one. You would have thought I had pierced his heart with a sword. He rushed to pick it up and a flood of apologies flowed from him. So much for being lighthearted. It was then my turn at apologizing.
I found myself wondering how many conflicts have begun because of misunderstandings. How many heartfelt attempts at goodness have been misjudged? More than once I have had to apologize to a student because of some thoughtless remark. And often it just pops out without forethought.
The key is to be quick to apologize. James 3 is a great chapter to read at least once a year.
Written by Roger Bothwell on April 29, 2010
Spring of Life Ministry, PO Box 124, St. Helena, CA 94574
Rogerbothwell.org