Selfishness pervades my being. Try as I might, all my attempts to be kind, generous and thoughtful of others lead me to an examination of my motives. Through the years I have learned that like begets like. “A soft answer turns away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.” Proverbs 15:1. Since I do not like confrontation I do everything I can to ease a tense situation. I do it for my comfort. I do not steal because I realize stealing tears away the fabric of our civilization and leads to chaos. I do not steal for my comfort. I can go through a list of supposed virtues that I seek to maintain and each ends with “I do or don’t do it for my comfort.”
A friend of mine said to me, “An apple tree produces apples because it is an apple tree and not to become an apple tree.” When I first heard that I heartily agreed and espoused it as great theology. However, I am no longer sure. I produce apples because I don’t want to be useless. Being useless makes me feel as if I have no value. I want to have value; therefore, I produce apples. I do it for my psychological comfort. I give to the poor because it makes me feel good. It is no wonder Paul cried out, “Woe is me for I am undone. Who will rescue me from me?” Romans 7.
Since I want what I do not seem to be able to achieve I will put my trust in Him who promises to save to the uttermost. Hebrews 7. I Corinthians 15 is amazing. We are promised this corruption will be taken away and for the first time ever will do something purely for love.
Written by Roger Bothwell on February 7, 2013
Spring of Life, PO Box 124, St. Helena, CA 94574
Rogerbothwell.org